


i. spring

by egg-sunyoulk (you_lynxed_it)



Series: seasons [1]
Category: K-pop, UP10TION
Genre: M/M, mostly shinsun being soft for each other, the rest of 96-line appears for like 10 seconds oops
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-05
Updated: 2018-07-05
Packaged: 2019-06-05 14:59:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,167
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15173180
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/you_lynxed_it/pseuds/egg-sunyoulk
Summary: Everyone seems to know that Yein is in love with Wooseok. Everyone, of course, except for Yein and Wooseok themselves.





	i. spring

At some point, Yein starts living his life around Wooseok’s schedule.

He tells himself it’s normal. It really isn’t that bizarre, considering that they’re roommates.

Quarter to six, Yein looks up from his books; thinks,  _ Wooseok’s walking to the ramen place now.  _ Clock hits nine, Yein puts away the dishes,  _ Wooseok’s probably walking to the back to take off his apron.  _ Half past nine, watching reruns of a show they watched together on the weekend,  _ Wooseok’s taking the counter key from Joohyun now.  _ One in the morning, brushing his teeth,  _ Wooseok’s handing off the counter key to Hyejin _ . 

And finally, half an hour later, Wooseok opens the door. Yein takes his bag and his leftovers from the ramen place; puts the bag in their room and the leftovers in the microwave as Wooseok heads to the shower. Sometimes he’s too tired to shower. Sometimes he’ll just brush his teeth and then come up behind Yein and rest his head on his shoulder. Those times, Yein will put the leftovers in the fridge and coax Wooseok into walking the short distance to their bedroom, instead of just collapsing on their couch.

This is Yein’s routine, every single weekday for two months. He tells himself it’s because he’s a light sleeper; that he’d wake up when Wooseok opened the door and there’d be no point in sleeping early. 

He would never admit that he’s worried for Wooseok going without rest for nearly eight hours. He would never admit that the real reason he can’t sleep before Wooseok comes back is that his brain plays out all these scenarios: a sleep-deprived Wooseok not looking before crossing the street, or tripping over the sidewalk, or being attacked on the dark, empty streets. He would never admit that, after the clock hits one thirty and Wooseok isn’t home, his heart starts picking up speed and the only way to bring it back down is to feel Wooseok’s hand in his.

He would never admit any of it- not to himself, and not to Wooseok. Instead he says, as Wooseok leaves for his Thursday afternoon class: “It looks like rain.”

“So it does.” Wooseok grabs his granola bar off the counter. “You’ll be fine?”

“Not me, stupid. You’re the one walking. Bring an umbrella.”

“I can’t fit it in my bag. I’d have to carry it everywhere.” Wooseok makes a face. “I’ll take my chances.”

Around four, the first little spatters of rain hit the window. Twenty minutes later, it’s pouring.

Yein spends the next hour trying to read one page of his textbook. Every time he gets halfway through a sentence, he thinks about Wooseok walking through the rain, and then he has to start the sentence again. Quarter past five, it’s still pouring, and he can’t take it anymore- he closes the textbook and grabs the umbrella.

It occurs to him as he’s sprinting to the main arts building that  _ maybe  _ he should have worn more than just a t-shirt. 

Turns out an umbrella doesn’t help when you’re running through the pouring rain. It’s too late to turn back now, though, so he grits his teeth and ignores the rain pelting his arms.

When he gets there, there are already students that he recognizes from Wooseok’s program, walking out under umbrellas. He hurries in, dripping from both his umbrella and his arms, and hopes that Wooseok hasn’t left yet.

He hasn’t, thank god. He’s easy to spot- he’s one of the only ones without an umbrella. His eyes narrow, then widen as Yein comes into his field of vision.

“Yein? What are you doing here?”

“I knew you would need your umbrella,” Yein says. He means it to sound smug. It comes out a little more pathetic than he would’ve liked. The chattering teeth probably doesn’t help.

Wooseok shakes his head and grabs Yein’s hand, leading them down the hall into the nearby bathroom.

“You’ll be late for work,” Yein protests. Wooseok is pulling out a long piece of paper towel from the dispenser. He pats down Yein’s arms with it, then his hair, then the collar of his shirt, which is soaked. 

“Don’t worry about that.”

Wooseok tosses the paper towel in the trash and takes off his hoodie. Yein watches him, stunned for a second.

“What are you doing?”

“Wear this. You’re going to freeze to death.”

“Wooseok, no- you’ll be cold.”

“I wasn’t the one running for twenty minutes in the rain.”

Yein flushes red and pulls on the hoodie. When he’s gotten his arms all the way through the sleeves, he looks up to find Wooseok with a small smile on his face.

“You’re crazy, you know that?”

Yein can’t stop the ridiculous grin from spreading across his face. “What a rude way to talk to your hero.”

Wooseok ruffles his still-wet hair. “Some hero you are.”

They walk to the ramen place together, Wooseok holding the umbrella and Yein pressed against his side, holding his arm. The rain stops halfway and Wooseok closes up the umbrella, but Yein doesn’t let go of his arm. 

He walks alone back to their apartment with a smile he can’t quite suppress, holding the umbrella in one hand and clenching the sleeve of Wooseok’s hoodie in the other.

 

 

* * *

  
  
  


Their first real fight happens on a Saturday night, the first week of May. Sungjun, Minsoo, and Changhyun are over to share a pizza and try out a couple of Sungjun’s new (second-hand) video games.

“Hyejin’s gone for the next month,” says Wooseok while Sungjun’s switching the discs, “and I was thinking I could work a little longer. Maybe until two or two thirty.”

“No,” Yein says at the same time that Changhyun says “what the hell, Wooseok?”

“No,” Yein repeats. “That’s too long. That’s nine hours without rest. I swear to god, Kim Wooseok, if you-”

“Okay, okay.” Wooseok raises a hand in surrender. “I was just thinking about it. You wouldn’t have to wait up for me, though. You could just finish your tutoring lesson and sleep. I’d be quiet as a mouse coming in.”

“Tutoring lesson? What tutoring lesson?” Changhyun says, frowning. Minsoo shoots Yein a Look- one that says  _ please tell me you did not.  _ Yein feels the dread bubbling up in his stomach, rising up in his throat.  _ I did. Please, please- _

“Yein has a tutoring lesson with someone over Skype,” Wooseok says. “Advanced music theory, or something. That’s why it takes so long. You didn’t know?”

“Advanced music theory?” Changhyun laughs. “Yein’s definitely not qualified to teach advanced music theory.”

“He doesn’t have a tutoring lesson,” Sungjun says. “He’s just staying up for you. ‘Cause he  _ loooves  _ you.”

“Sungjun,” says Minsoo. “Just start the game already. Where are the controllers?”

Even as Changhyun and Sungjun start arguing over where they left the fourth controller, Wooseok stays silent. Yein’s too afraid to look over at his expression. The space between them feels like it’s frozen over; like he can’t move or everything will crack.

For the rest of the night, Wooseok talks to the others, without a word to Yein. Yein doesn’t mind- he feels like he’ll crumple up in guilt if he makes eye contact with Wooseok.

When they start packing up the video games and cleaning up the table, Yein’s heart starts pounding. By the time the door closes behind them, he can barely hear his own breathing over the sound of his heartbeat.

He’s hoping they can just go to sleep in silence, and wake up on Sunday to talk it out. The tension’s too thick right now- maybe if they sleep long enough, it’ll go away. 

Then he hears Wooseok sigh.

“Why’d you lie to me?”

Yein swallows, opens his mouth, closes it. He doesn’t know what to say, or how to phrase it to convince both Wooseok and himself that this was somehow the right thing to do.

“I’m sorry. I- I don’t, I didn’t want you to feel bad.”

“Well, I feel way worse now than I would’ve if you just told me the truth from the beginning.” Wooseok sounds tired. Yein’s heart aches. He wants to reach out and hug all the bad feelings away. “It’s just- why did you have to lie?”

“I- you asked me why I was still awake, back then, and I just. I panicked. I didn’t want you to be upset that I was staying up for you, Wooseok, or for you to tell me to stop.”

Silence. A long sigh.

“I’m gonna take a shower.”

Yein nods meekly, then croaks out an “okay” when he realizes Wooseok can’t see him. 

When Yein steps into their bedroom, Wooseok’s already on his bed, curled up against the wall with his back facing Yein. Biting his lip, Yein slips into his own bed and stares at the ceiling, wondering how he’s going to fix this in the morning.

 

 

* * *

  
  
  


Yein wakes up to the sound of rain and a heaviness in his chest. 

He’d already known this was going to be a bad day from their fight yesterday. But rain? This is some kind of heavenly middle finger. He hates rain, especially being inside when it rains, feeling like the world’s mad at him or maybe sad and everyone’s so far away and isolated and he just hates it all.

Usually Wooseok’s here to help with rainy days, but Wooseok’s mad and maybe sad from yesterday and there’s no way he’s gonna play along with Yein’s ridiculousness today. So Yein reaches for his headphones on the nightstand, ready to block out the world for the next few hours. Unfortunately, he miscalculates and they hit the ground with a  _ thump _ .

Footsteps. Wooseok appears in the doorway. Yein panics a little bit, one arm still hanging off the bed, and flails around until he’s (half) sitting up. He thinks he might see the corner of Wooseok’s lip turn up.

“Good morning.”

“Um.” Yein clears his throat, watching Wooseok’s expression carefully. “Good morning.”

“I see you’re awake.” Wooseok smiles fully this time, and there’s something strained in it but it still makes Yein’s insides go all gooey and warm. “Go brush your teeth and then come to the living room.”

“What- why? What are we doing?” Okay, this is happening. They’re going to talk about it and then Yein’s going to mess up his words and Wooseok’s going to get mad and he’ll never forgive him and their friendship’s going to be over.

“What we always do.” Wooseok tilts his head. “We’re going to cuddle, eat cereal, and watch cartoons until the rain stops being annoying.”

And then Yein realizes- Wooseok’s putting his own feelings aside to take care of him. He’s just pushing it aside, just like that, because he wants Yein to feel okay and oh god, there are tears pricking at his eyelids. 

“Hurry up,” Wooseok calls, and with a start Yein realizes he’s already in the living room. “The next show’s starting in five minutes.”

Once the cereal’s poured and the show’s started, Yein tentatively scoots closer to Wooseok. An audible sigh, then Wooseok’s pulling him into his side. Yein leans on Wooseok’s shoulder, breathing a huff of relief into the crook of his neck.

They stay like that for the whole episode, moving only to take bites of soggy cereal. When the opening theme starts for the next show, Yein’s sorted out his thoughts enough to put into clear-enough words.

“I’m sorry, Wooseok. I shouldn’t have lied to you.”

Wooseok pours more cereal into his bowl, then Yein’s. “We don’t have to talk about it right now, if you don’t want to.”

“No, I want to.” Yein sits up straighter, blanket falling from his shoulders. “I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

Wooseok leans back against the couch. “I know you wouldn’t ever  _ want  _ to hurt me, but it… it still hurt. Lying to me. No matter the purpose.”

“I’m sorry. I won’t lie like that again.” Yein presses himself against Wooseok’s side, hoping it can somehow communicate how he feels. “I promise.”

“Can you just answer one thing? Why did you want to wait up for me so much?”

“I…” Yein hesitates, then thinks  _ fuck it.  _ “I want to be here when you come home. I want to know that you’re safe.”

Silence. Does Wooseok think he’s weird? Creepy? Obsessive? All of the above?

He feels Wooseok laugh more than he hears it, his shoulders shaking against Yein’s.

“Okay. Valid reason. I’d like you to at least get a nap in before I come home, but we can talk about that later. Commercials are about to end.”

_ I love you _ , is what Yein wants to say, but he can’t, so instead he says “feed me, please” and watches Wooseok spill half a spoon of milk over the carpet.

It’s here in this dim living room surrounded by empty pizza boxes, bits of cereal, and piles of blankets that Yein realizes he loves Wooseok.

And it’s here that he realizes that maybe loving Wooseok isn’t so bad.


End file.
